It has been awhile.

It has been awhile. We lost so much this past winter. Beethoven is gone now. He went in his sleep. But now he's ashes are besides Luicsa upstairs. The trial for the monster that killed Jeanette hasn't happened yet.

But I am hoping for a better summer this year.

Oh forgot to let you all know, not that anyone cares. But we got Luicsa's ashes back yesterday. They came in a very small box that is kind of sweet. Now they want to put a label on it and then I have no idea where they are going to put her then.

This is Bubba as you can see he is a clown.

Him and his buddy Skip came to live with us at the beginning of the summer. After thier owner past away, and his wife had to go to live in a care center.

Thanks to them, they have save us. Back in 2009 when we lost Wolfie,

she had lived with us for 10 years. There was not a place this girl did not go. She trusted us and never question anything that we did. Dad had gotten her for me after my Doberman Prince had been killed by a hit and run, call her husband, "I think I may have hit something," in front of all the school kids heading for school....Never mind I am getting off track. After her death Robert found Luicsa.

She was everything to him and never left his side. So he took it much harder then I did when she past last month. After everything we had been though with her, being allergic to bees then getting lost up at Thistle for three days. I still think she fell in the river and got washed away.

 To lose her to something like epilepsy, as fast as it took her. Was one of life's cruel jokes. With in 48 hours she became some thing that none of us knew. The Vet wouldn't even let any of us near her for fear of what she could do.

Now tell me, dose this look like a face of someone who would hurt us? Not to me, but it could have happened.; She didn't know who any of us where.

So now we have Bubba and Skip, and I thank god everyday that they are here. Some times I think they are all that holds me together.

I know that it has been awhile, but things keep happening and I have no idea how to put them. We lost Jeanette on May 19 of this year. She just went to sleep.

I would kind of say that is the way I would like to go. As long as I don't have to go though all the bull she did before hand. I still think her Mom came back and pushed her out of the window, and by the way she lived on the second floor. Two other women on the same floor died in the fire that was set by a real life monster, because she had a fight with her boyfriend. Really good reason to commit murder don't you think!? Bitch

0

August 2 we had to put Luicsa to sleep. She developed epilepsy out of no where and had so violent seizures that it caused brain damage. She had no idea who any of where. The vet said that there was no way that he could send her home with us the way she was. She had even damaged the kennel that she was in and tried to attack him.

 So as you can see it has been one hell of a summer. God can we get back to normal now?

Still a blind eye have we.

Long ago I learned that in this game, as in life no one is willing to accept fault. Even when it has flashing lights and warning bells. It is always someone else fault. So, in so keeping here is what I saw last game.

Still a blind eye have we.

Mistakes have been made,
Lives have been lost.

But who is willing to accept?

Each one of us,
Have been marked.

What was it, that brought us here?

Can any of us look inside?
Will any of us stop and think?

The hands of fate.

Cold hands reach out for each,
Judgments’ scales wait for us.

When was the beginning?

Can any of us truly say,
It did not start with me!

Where did it start?

The boat, the island or crypt?
Or could it have began before even then?

By who?

Think before you accuse,
Listen before you convict.

Why?

Back to the beginning.
Who is willing to accept fault?

How dose time just slip by?

I can not believe that it has been almost a year. There has been more days then I care to admit too, that I have came so close to back sliding. What am I talking about you say?! "Stopped Smoking," of course! Well I had decided on this last year, I was worrying about how my family and friends would act about it. Well they have stood with me all the way. Trying to stay down wind of me and not get to close when they had just finished one, I for one can tell you there is nothing smellier then someone just after they have had a smoke. I never really realized how bad I was smelling till I had quit! Or how it carried on everything I had been around. 

What surprised me the most, was when two of my friends followed me a month or so later. Paul is always making comments on how he will never go back! I am very proud of him and Venieca, haveing to live with Elad and his not realizing how hard he has made it for them, but hopefully he will get the message soon and follow the rest of us.

That brings me to a very happy thing! Robert is calling it quits Saturday night!! After his fathers death, it got a point across and scared the hell out of him. So he has set his date! I know he is going to be a bear, but I also know that he can do it. He may not believe me, but I am there for him and, so understand!! I love you Robert, bunchies and bunchies!

Now to everyone out there I say, "Here is to your New Year. I hope, and pray for some of you, that the next year brings advancements and happiness, good health and growing love. That things start to work in your favor and the fates mind their own path for awhile!"

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

Eleven Monthes, three days!!

You know with everything that has happened this year I do not know how I kept smoke free. Jeanette and the fire, Nancy and the shafting at work, injuries, Robert’s dad passing(10-22-11). But some how I have done it. This has been the longest I have ever been smoke free. Now onto the next problem….WIEGHT!  I have a membership at Planet Fitness and Have made all of 2 visits there so far. Not to bad for having the membership for a week. Now if I could just make it 3 visits in a week I would be so happy. I may have to just go with out Robert though. He is really bad into WOW big time again. I really don’t know what it is with him, News or WOW. I guess I should just be happy that it isn’t both at the same time. Tonight is the first game in a month and of course it had to snow last night. Don’t look like much out there but it just had to do it. Thanks allot.